Since you're reading my blog, it's probably fair to guess that you're not content to coast through life, and that you've got ambitions that you're chasing. Maybe, like mine, these ambitions are beyond your current scope. They're things that will require years of effort to achieve, and maybe the feasibility of ever achieving them is in question.
How will you do this? You'll need to level up. Your skills or access or resources or maybe all three will have to increase.
The common fantasy is that you'll meet the right person who can carry you there effortlessly. Maybe I'll meet Zuckerberg, he'll decide he needs a blogging platform, and he'll buy Sett for millions, give me a huge team, and allow me to use Facebook's resources to usher in a new era of blogging.
Or maybe I'll have to do it on my own, like everyone else.
So if my big break isn't going to come from Zuckerberg, from where will it come? The answer is, of course, the advantages I build myself. And unlike connections or blind luck, there are fundamental advantages that I can give myself.
I call these advantages because they're things that I, and you, can have over other people. If I'm not the only person trying to make a blogging platform, I'd better have some advantages over those guys.
The biggest advantage I can build is to use my time well. Most people don't use their time well at all, so this is an easy one. Work seven days a week, work long hours, and spend all or most consumption time learning things.
Another big advantage I can build is to refuse to quit. Almost everyone quits when things begin to get dicey, so if I'm willing to push through that, I'm at an advantage.
I can become a T shape person. I can become very good at a few things, and then learn usable amounts about a huge breadth of topics. Very few people do this; most refuse to branch beyond the limits dictated by their stereotype, and even those who do are unlikely to ever master anything.
I can be a good person. This is free, and it makes my life easy and ingratiates me to others. Be happy, treat people well, don't lie, organize fun things for others. We all have different ways of being good people, and a lot of us do this, but not that many do it actively rather than reactively.
Last, I can take risks. These are where the largest payoffs are, because so few people are comfortable with them.
So often we covet those advantages that we can't have. Maybe we do it because it insulates us from the responsibility of success. There's nothing wrong with wanting those things, unless that want comes at the expense of building the advantages that are fully within your control.
Photo is from the inside of an airborne hot air balloon.
We're on day 4 or 5 of our cruise now, and we already have about 30% of the passengers doing our secret gang handshake. Can't wait to share all the stories from the cruise.
A huge thank you to everyone buying my new book! It's been #2 for a long time in its category!
After many months of being deprioritized due to Sett and other obligations, I've finally finished my new book on habits, Superhuman by Habit. It's available right now on Amazon.
I've been writing for nine years now, and a good portion of that time has been spent focused on self-improvement. How can I get the most out of life? Out of myself? As I've gone down this path, the answers I've found have coalesced around habit building. Get your habits right, and everything else falls into place.
Doing things when they're the most fun and exciting things to do is easy. Those are the gains that everyone gets. Once we move beyond that, we have to rely on willpower. The problem with willpower is that gains are slow and incremental.
Habits, on the other hand, are the mechanism by which we can leverage our willpower. Rather than relying on willpower for everything, we use it only to build new habits. Once a habit is installed, it uses little to no willpower. That's why I called the book Superhuman by Habit-- habits let us expand our capabilities exponentially. Things that were difficult become easy, and stay that way.
As I write, I'm flying over Wyoming on my way to Kansas City, Missouri. I'll be there for approximately fourteen hours, just long enough to watch the Invicta FC 8 Women's MMA fight and then get some sleep. Such opulence! To fly across the country just to go to a sporting event.
The truth, though, is that this flight isn't costing me anything. In fact, other than crazy deals I've come across, I haven't paid for a flight in quite a while. In a year exactly, I've racked up 750,000 frequent flyer miles. That's enough for 30 domestic round trips or 8-20 international trips.
There's a hustle going on that isn't exactly underground, but isn't quite mainstream either, that allows you to build up huge stores of frequent flyer miles very quickly.
In order to entice you to sign up for their credit cards, credit card companies offer huge sign-up bonuses of frequent flier miles. Some of these miles are airline specific, some can be converted to a few different airlines, and others are used as cash to offset travel expenses.
I think that the way most people spend money is absolutely nuts. I see people buying things they can't really afford, or things that will have no lasting impact on their lives whatsoever, and I cringe. Be frugal, I want to yell.
On the other hand, there are people who go way out of their way to save a dollar, even When spending that dollar would really make their life better, or create some lasting memory that would impact them long after the dollar was gone. Don't be cheap, be frugal, I want to yell.
Maybe a better phrase for frugal, at least the way I think of it, is financially-efficient. And just like most mistakes I see people make, this one stems from not actually thinking about decisions and just going with the flow.
Money should only be spent if you have it, first of all. Just because everyone else has a car doesn't mean that you are somehow entitled to one, too. If you don't have money for a car, don't buy one. Never finance anything, with the possible exception of a house. Even then, I think it's usually a bad idea.
I'm always interested in finding blind spots or misconceptions in common knowledge. Most people don't seem to really get what they want out of life, and while this is partly fueled by society pushing wants on people, it's also due to blind spots. Sometimes big problems go unsolved not because we're incapable of solving them, but because we have no idea they exist.
One I've been thinking about recently is that of preparation vs. execution. Every day I have to write a blog post, something I've been doing for half a year now. This sometimes feels like an enormous task, but never takes more than half an hour. Usually it's more like twenty minutes.
The reason it feels so difficult, I realized, is because the preparation is the hard part. Writing is easy and doesn't take all that long. The hard part is coming up with a topic every single day. That I've mashed my fingers on a keyboard every day doesn't seem so difficult, but coming up with 180 different things to write about in a row? That's another story entirely.
The difficulty in a lot of other endeavors is also in the prep. Cooking is mostly tedious because you have to prepare. Even programming is the same way. Once you know what problem you're going to solve, and roughly how to solve it, the actual coding is quite easy.
It's been nearly a year since we bought an island near Halifax. We went in being completely clueless, our only salvation knowing that we were completely clueless and would have to learn a lot. And boy, have we. I've spent more time on the island than in my RV over the past couple months, and it's begun to feel like a second home. The rhythms of the island and the environment around it have become familiar.
When we bought the island, it was nearly completely wild. The previous owner had cleared a small area where he'd intended to build a small cabin, but otherwise the island was so dense that it was nearly impenetrable. Our first night there we were excited to venture into the woods, and gave up immediately upon seeing how close together the trees were.
We now have a trail system so extensive that it's hard for me to keep it all straight. In fact, yesterday we ended up widening the wrong trail, and were surprised to end up at the tide pools rather than a 15 foot tall rock we call Eagle Rock. On our first trip we carved a trail from the clearing to the center of the island, going north. Since then we've expanded the trail system to branch from the center point to the east, and to the west. There's a half-finished trail that goes north to the ocean, a half finished trail that goes south on the west side, and a finished trail that connects the clearing and the fire pit area.
It's day five of the fifth trip to our island. We don't yet have any sort of permanent structure, so even with cots, sleep isn't perfect. And there's the irregular meal schedule, the hard work, and the lack of good hygiene. All of these factors wear you down a little bit as the days go on.
Today we were all exhausted. We woke up early, but no one made a move to get done the things which needed doing. We punted around through the forest looking for good branches for torches, our latest obsession, but mostly we waited until it was time to leave the island.
We had scheduled a tour at 2:30 at Oak Island, which is just a couple hours away. The tour group was surprisingly large, maybe fifty people or so. We hiked all throughout the island, learning about it and seeing firsthand some of the strange clues pointing towards possible treasure.
As we hiked in the heat on the island, I noticed that I was really lagging. Mentally, I wasn't all there. Physically, I was tired. By the end, the three of us were sitting down while the guide talked. We were the only ones not to stand.
Las Vegas is a city that has its own set of rules and norms. When you check into a hotel in any other city, you get the room that you paid for. But Vegas is built on comps and kickbacks, and the room you end up in doesn't necessarily have much to do with the one that you paid for. One method to getting a better room is to discreetly slip a twenty dollar bill to the clerk. Based on voluntary reporting by people who've tried it, it works 85% of the time.
I'm sitting in a suite at Bally's right now. I booked the basic room, which cost around $30 per night, and included a $20/day food and beverage comp. I was upgraded, but I didn't use the twenty dollar trick. These days I get upgraded about half the time. The upgrade I got on the room before this was very minor, I didn't get one the time before that, but prior to that one I got a crazy suite with a jacuzzi in the bedroom and a separate living room.
My secret is to treat the checkin clerks like real people. It sounds simple, and your first thought might be that most people would do that, but that hasn't been my observation.
We don't have to interact with others so much, if we don't want to. I used today's twenty dollar food credit to order food from the Thai restaurant at Bally's. Rather than simply walk downstairs or call them, I used the app TalkTo to type what I want and have them order it for me. Interactions between friends and family are also slowly becoming more and more abstracted, first from in-person to voice, and now from voice to text.
My life is so good that I really have no call to complain or worry about anything. That doesn't always stop me, though. Last night I got some bad news and discovered that the yurt we're planning on raising definitely won't get there in time. It's not going to be crated up for a few days, and even if I flew there and rented an extraordinarily expensive U-Haul truck, the schedule doesn't work out.
This made me feel generally bad. I was frustrated and tired of dealing with the construction of this yurt at the island, because the whole multi-month process has been an exercise in wheel-spinning.
I was crewing a hot air balloon at a festival, so I had to wake up early the next morning. Sleep wouldn't come easily, as every time I began to drift off, I'd try to think of some other way to get the yurt going, or just think about things I could have done earlier to make it happen.
I stopped meditating daily, but I made myself do it again as I lay in bed. Deep breath. Focus on exhaling. Maybe I could leave here now and fly and get a truck... no, just breathe.
I'm exhausted. I took a red-eye from Las Vegas to DC, which is a bad idea to begin with because the flight is only four hours long. Even if you sleep the whole time, you're still exhausted. I didn't sleep, though, partly because it's hard to sleep on planes, and partly because the largest airplane neighbor I've ever had was pressed up against me and threatening to engulf my thigh in hers.
So I didn't sleep at all, and I'm exhausted.
I can't really afford to be exhausted, though. If I go to sleep at noon, which I desperately wanted to do, my schedule would be shot for days. And I have to do a touch Sett, do a language tape, and write a blog post.
It's so easy to push that burden to your future self and suffer later. I'll just write two blog posts tomorrow. I can skip a day on my language tape and leave it up to my future self to pick up the slack. Sett stuff can wait. And, hey, why not sleep now and fix that sleep schedule later?