I can’t remember or easily find when I started writing weekly posts, but I think it’s been something like 5-7 years. Since committing to doing so I haven’t once missed a week, although my post time did gradually shift from Thursday morning to Sunday evening. At this point I realize that I’m posting weekly only because I said I was going to, and not because I actually want to. So from now on I’m going to just post whenever I want to.
I’ve wrestled with this decision for a long time because (as I may have mentioned about 1000 times) I take streaks really seriously and don’t like breaking them. But when the benefit of doing something is only that it keeps a streak alive, it’s a good time to reevaluate. At the end of the day I’m now writing because I feel obligated to, not because I have something I’m dying to write about, so I want to switch that around for a while.
If you have feedback on this I’m open to hearing it, and always remain open to suggestions for posts. If I know that people really want to hear about something I’m very likely to write about it. I’m also hoping that this change will give me an opportunity to work on better and more detailed posts, so please let me know if you feel like it improves (or doesn’t improve) post quality.
Photo is from our cruise last week in Alaska. People stash canoes and kayaks in the woods near a mountain lake that you can find and use. I read that they don’t include paddles so I was really excited to make my own paddle. It worked pretty well but started to fall apart.
I am going to experiment and only announce the next Tea Time with Tynan on my Youtube Channel, so subscribe to it and enable notifications if you want to make sure you catch it.
You do what’s good for you champ. Since I’m not paying for posts I’m just happy to read them whenever you write them.
I left a reply a few days ago which you responded to (very maturely) about how I found you a bit self-centred compared to before: when you used to post about adventures amongst other things, but now it can come across as self-aggrandizing lectures to your audience.
I’m sorry that it might have come across as an attack or harsh. I started reading your blog because you came across as a really fun, interesting guy having a conversation. And at some point, it felt like you were just going through the motions with your posts, doing it for the sake of it and almost coming across as an advice column.
That’s all well and good, because who doesn’t want advice on how to buy and live on an island and stuff like that?
But the posts now read as something robotic and monotonous. I had no idea you started doing tea time videos on Youtube, and I thought, “man, this is such a cool and personable guy. Why does he not come across like this in his posts anymore?”
I don’t know. A lot of the humour, passion, energy seems to have been left out and all seem to be a “how to” post: how to invest, how to travel, how to be more productive.
That’s all well and good, but I personally (not sure how many people would agree) aren’t interested in the influx of these sort of advice posts from you, and more interested in the HUMAN behind all that.
Like, what are your struggles? What are the parts that aren’t so nice? What are the messy bits? Where are all the challenges?
Posts tend to go into this sometimes, but they’re just so shallow or not deep at all. That might be down to your posting schedule or whatever, but all the more reason to put emphasis on quality over quantity.
You’re not going on crazy adventures anymore, but I think most of your readers aren’t coming here as new readers. Maybe a few here and there from links from your gear posts, or interesting things like buying an island.
But the majority have been with you from a while back. For example, I’m quite interested in your journey from being a pick up artist (I first found your blog over a decade ago from that point) to where you’re at now: you’re not the guy in an RV, a PUA, a full-time traveller. You’ve got several properties, you’re married, and you occasionally travel.
You don’t OWE any myself or any of your audience anything. You don’t have to post about what anyone wants, or reveal more about your life than you want to. But I think there must be an understanding that a lot of people have basically grown up with you, they see you almost as a friend or there’s a level of familiarity… which is why people bother paying to go to your Superhuman events and to get coached.
Despite – as you pointed out – the lack of marketing for your blog or anything like that. As far as ‘relevance’ goes, you’re not up there amongst public figures right now, and that’s not a bad thing. But it’s remarkable the level of engagement you have, in spite of that.
Personally, as a reader and part of your audience, it’s been very difficult to ‘connect’ with you as an actual person, or get an idea of how you’ve developed over the years.
Yeah, you’ve changed and your circumstances have, too. I get that. But it feels very disjointed. Using the travel example, it’s like touching down in a country for a few days with a tour guide quickly talking about things and locations before rushing you off to the next destination, ticking things off.
Which is okay. But it’s not the same as really taking one’s time, spending time with the locals, hearing their story.
Considering your blog has been around for decades and it’s got to this point, in favour of bashing out posts every day, or writing them in bulk? Or advice columns and glossing over life?
I dunno, man. I liked it more when it was like, hanging out with a really cool dude and getting to know him. Hearing his stories because they were STORIES, and he was expressing himself more so than putting advice out there.
SETT obviously didn’t help, because nobody could actually speak to you because of the comments situation.
Maybe I’ve got the wrong idea over what your blog is? And what your relationship with readers is?
It kind of used to be like reading a book, a GOOD book. You know, when you read a book and feel a connection to the character? Almost like you’re in a room together, talking? It was written well. It sometimes felt like you were on a journey together.
Now it’s like… well, to be honest, it reads a lot like these PUA gurus and their newsletters. Like it’s some kind of Buzzfeed article.
They’re awesome sometimes, of course. But it’s just not fun anymore. I like being able to learn from you, but that’s all this blog comes across as sometimes: you teaching people things.
Maybe that’s what it’s kind of always been like: getting out of the box.
But man, I’m more interested in cool posts going in-depth. Detailing a STORY, not an article going on about how to DO something. The writer side of you seems to have been engulfed by ‘Coach Tynan.’
Like, I remember years ago you said companies send you so much stuff to review. Okay… what then? What do you do with all that stuff? Have you ever thought about just giving some quick impressions on it? In a video, even? Fair enough if you’re not interested in that at all, I know you like to be efficient with your time. But you are one of the Godfathers of this whole minimalistic travel thing. Have you thought about doing giveaways? Encouraging others to do the impressions for you, and posting that?
Isn’t that in a way, helping and encouraging others to continue what you started? Getting cool gear into their hands, getting them to write, to get out there and out of the box? Isn’t that a great use of your legacy?
You said you’re older now, so not doing so many crazy things, and the above suggestion is probably one of those things of no interest. Where is the line for the box and comfort zone? Are you just putting yourself in another box and keeping yourself in a new comfort zone? What was wrong with the old one?
Youtube is where it’s at now, and your tea time things are pretty cool, but the diminishing views are evident. I get that you’re not so concerned about that, but wouldn’t it be cool to leverage the fact you have a Youtube channel and you come across differently there?
Less dry, less ‘Coach Tynan’ and just a dude? A tea time here and there is great, but how about a tour of places you like, that some people will never get to go to? The island? Your automated house? Some karaoke requests? Hell, even doing karaoke WITH your viewers (I see people on Youtube do this a lot).
Again, just an idea because you don’t HAVE to let anyone into your home and don’t owe that welcoming into your private space to people. And you might not want to bother, because as you said to me, you have other priorities. But could it be something cool? To include people who have been ‘fans’ of yours for decades?
I think it could. Because you have been one of these internet figures that’s come across as more distant than others. I am biased as a previous follower in saying that kind of sucks.
Obviously not going to the other end of the spectrum of these ‘always on’ Youtube personalities and streamers. But is there room for that?
But I digress from your writing. All of that can be achieved in your writing, I think. Topics you write about, how about balancing them out by inviting your readers to give a topic and REALLY drilling into it? Or talking about it in a Youtube video?
Like, you were VERY vague about getting back into dating up to marrying your wife. Personal stuff, that’s fine. But a guy like you who deviates from social norms… I’m sure you’ve got LOTS of funny stories about Tinder, and insights from being a PUA.
Why haven’t we got more of that? Why is it all rushed through? Does it have to turn into an advice column?
If you sat down to have tea and talk with someone about that, I’m sure it would be a fascinating conversation. On your blog? It’s never felt like that.
The opportunity to turn it into that sitting down and having tea comes across more like you sitting on an elevated cushion amongst a crowd waiting to give brief answers to interesting questions, whilst incense burns in the background and a sitar plays in the background.
That might be my projection, but I think your blog (especially now you’ve ditched SETT) could be SO much cooler and involved with the people who read and take an interest in you.
And maybe even the other way around, because it rarely seems like you take an interest in your audience. Again, that might be due to the comments not being allowed, but there’s never really been much engagement in the forms of questions, or whatever.
You don’t have to do anything, including fathoming giving up any less time to your other pursuits for your blog and audience.
But I mean, if you’re gonna do something, do it well, right? You’ve built an audience, a blog for 20 years. It’s like a baby. Why not let it have its ultimate potential?
Through quality over quantity?
Like, someone asked about Chipotle in one of your livestreams, right? You’d have to go SO far back and through multiple posts over multiple years to get an understanding of how you arrived at eating that so much and why. And even then, the posts are again, short little tidbits spread out over sparse and far between posts, going into small little details.
Your STORY would be so much cooler. A conversation would be so much cooler, with humour, anecdotes. When was the first time you had it? When was that eureka moment of “I could eat this everyday.” What were some of the books you read that helped you arrive at that point? How about some links? To previous posts? Or just make a decent post that you can link back to in the future?
What about a contrast to how things were being a PUA to being married? I’ve had so many cool conversations with former PUA types, and their comments on the Red Pill movement, and how men are compelled to have sex with as many women as possible, to never settle down, to only go for younger women.
I’ve met a lot of these guys at tantra workshops who have done a complete turnaround, and now can’t imagine how they ever thought they could live without the intimacy of their current relationship. Their STORIES are amazing, not JUST their advice.
The writing of their evolution, and how their past pulled their strings from behind the scenes. The struggle of going from relationship to relationship, until they could get to the place they wanted to be.
That kind of thing coming from YOU, of all people? The guy who was featured in Strauss’ book? Who did it religiously? Who then had to confront the whole online dating thing? And is now married?
People relate to that more than bitty advice posts. People connect and learn more from that kind of thing. It’s why we are enamoured with movies, books, music. They tell a story. They reflect back our humanity. They show us who are and who we could be.
That might sound a bit deep, but that always seemed to be a kind of theme in your blog, but a well that has dried up for something easier, something quicker, more convenient.
The irony is that it’s becoming more like fast food blog posts, instead of something quality… with good ingredients sprinkled in. It’s just going through the motions, a blog post/advice machine pumping out posts.
I think I’ll get a lot of backlash for this (if others get through it all), and that your blog is fine, it is what it is, what I’m saying isn’t representative of what they like, etc.
But what does your blog mean to you? What about your relationship with your readers? Is the status quo of what it is and has been need to be upheld? Or can things get shaken up? Can things get more exciting?
Can your blog itself have a “life outside the box” as the page title says?
I definitely hope so.
Haha, now that you mention it..
– Gets married
– Buys house
– Settles down
– “Minimalist” but owns full set of power tools and set of golf clubs
– Buys boat
– Constantly talks about home improvement projects
Maybe you should change the title of the blog to “Life inside the box” 🙂
The sad thing is, I’ve been reading this guy’s blog for over 10 years and your summary there is about as vivid as I can recall him going on about his ‘adventures.’
They’re not stories or posts with lots of colour, details, emotion, feeling or anything of the sort. It’s just a grey list of checkpoints as you laid them out.
The blog it a box of mechanical bits of information on what a guy did. There are too many posts for anyone (especially new readers) to go back and digest, and the way everything is written isn’t interesting enough to bother, apart from a few “out of the box” articles here and there, like the one about buying the island, or what not.
The guy says he’s a writer, as well.
Being a good writer doesn’t mean doing lots of whacky things. Being a good writer is being able to connect with your readers and being able to make even the most mundane thing interesting to read.
Tynan has somehow achieved the opposite: he’s been able to mostly create a blog about a VERY interesting guy with a VERY interesting life full of VERY interesting things kind of uninteresting. Not boring so much, but it’s like a meal without any seasoning. It’s like a piece of fried chicken on its own.
It’s quick. You can make several of them at once. You can freeze them so there’s a backlog. It’s got SOME nutrition to it. But there’s no colour, no fragrance, no real flavour… and it becomes a chore to chew it.
Again, I don’t mean to sound entitled as he basically gets nothing from the blog; we’re not paying him for his posts. Well, perhaps that’s not strictly true since all his coaching and Super Human clients/customers come from the blog.
But I think Neil Strauss wrote in his book that Tynan was someone that got distracted by shiny things or toys, or something, moving from one to the next. I think it’s the same thing with his blog: his obsession for optimizing stuff has its detriments: fawning over optimization experiments to the point he would just pump out blog posts in bulk REALLY hurt his writing ability, I believe, and turned his blog into something akin to a “self-development, life hacker McDonalds” type fare.
I think he’s quite sure though that the blog is his playground, not somewhere to write well or be read well, though?
The sad thing is, I think Neil Strauss wrote about Tynan’s life (if only a period) better than Tynan has about many of his pursuits. And that was such a long time ago, and arguably what put Tynan in the public eye and was a precursor to this blog and many pursuits.
I would think that getting out of that shadow would be a worthwhile endeavour. Nobody knows Tynan like Tynan and his life has been SO much more interesting than the Project Hollywood days.
But for someone that’s so passionate about his life and loves it, none of that passion, energy or life comes across in his writing.
It’s just an exercise of posting for the sake of it.
I’ve gotta agree with most of what was said here. Long time reader (way back to BTYBF days…). I hop back in every once and a while to see how things are going but wouldn’t call myself an active participant. This blog has been a major source of inspiration for me over the years, including a minimalist backpacking trip across Latin America.
I hope that the new posting schedule, and maybe some of the suggestions above help get you excited about writing again, and look forward to continuing to follow along.
I cheer this change. I’ve followed this blog for years, and I hope many years to come! In recent years, I’ve wondered if you’ve over-optimized the process. Sometimes the posts feel like they are written according to a formula. I wonder if, by forcing yourself to have a rigid posting schedule (and doing things like trying to bang out huge numbers of posts in a limited amount of time) you might have squeezed some of the passion and fun you once had in the project.
Like, for example, you’re clearly excited recently about investing. It seems like you have interesting things to say here that are very hard to fit into the format you’ve created. I’d suggest that you step back and try to write from passion.
I’d encourage you to forget about discipline and focus on stoking your own passion. Write about what you’re excited about.
Another way to think about this (since you’re the optimizing type) would be to think about how to change your process to maximize passion and fun, rather than to maximize the efficiency in terms of # of posts per hour of your time. I think this would create a legacy you’d be more proud of long term.
Anyway, thanks for the many hours of free education and entertainment!
Designing and building your own folding steel frame smaller than Brompton bike. That would be a good adventure and post.
As a long time reader, I encourage this change. I like the idea of knowing that your next article was written because you were so passionate about it that you were absolutely compelled to put it out there. Should be fun to read!
Hi Tynan! With some of the negativity/frustration in these comments, I hope you don’t take it too badly. Comments were off on SETT for 5 years or so, and clearly some frustration was built up 🙂
What I always appreciated about your blog was the exploration of unusual ideas or lifestyles. 90% of the time they wouldn’t be interesting to me or apply to me, but 10% of the time they were great. The extremely wide range of things you tried regularly led to something that was very cool.
For example, you were a Digital Nomad before that was a thing. Very cool! I loved reading all of that, and it eventually inspired me to do the same thing for a few years. I loved it, and it’s the period of my life I look back on most fondly. You were a huge part in inspiring me to do this.
Another example was the constant mission to improve and streamline your gear. I love your gear posts, they’re my favorite of all yours posts by far. I don’t care for some of the stuff you have (like fancy watches or custom in-ear monitors) but have found some awesome products through your gear posts. Some things aren’t exactly outstanding but still work for me. In general, though, I love the process and the way you think about these things. And how relentless you are, never settling for some “ok” backpack when there’s a better solution out there.
The “shared properties” idea is something I’d never personally consider, maybe I have the wrong type of friends, lol. But it’s still interesting to read about, especially the island (WE NEED TO GET BACK TO THE ISLAND, KATE!).
Often times your processes are interesting. For example, I don’t particularly care for Chipotle, but your minimalist eating style is something I also practice. And seeing how your diet habits and ideas have evolved over the years was interesting too, although we ended up in different places.
The whole cruises idea is also kind of interesting. Corona is probably a bad time to get started, but I’ve always found your use of cruises as a “working vacation” cool. It’s those weird and curious slightly-different-uses (to avoid the word misuse) of regular things that made you stand out.
You’ve written that you focus more on family now and don’t want to talk about it. Of course if you don’t want to talk about the focus of your life, that’s going to be awkward – what will you talk about?
Hope you continue to have interesting things to say and stay curious enough to find new things you’ll tell us about.
Lmao at the negative comments. Someone lightly on the spectrum (compliment) achieves financial independence, excellent health, a great network of real world relationships, and a beautiful wife with very little friction in the relationship, and literally gives his roadmap and thinking process.
Of course you’re not emotion about it, you never get emotional about things that are “handled.”
You’re amazing, and your journey has helped me more than you know.
This blog is great. You’re great. Please keep writing in some form!
Drinking coffee and reading your new article is my Sunday morning ritual for a few years, so I am a bit bummed that it’s over. I always enjoy your perspective, but lately it felt a bit stale. As a writer, I know how hard it is to crank out high-quality articles on a weekly basis, and frankly, I am surprised you were able to do it for so long. A great compromise between habit and creative freedom would be a monthly article (e.g. every first Sunday), where you dig deeper into something you really want to write about. That way your writing streak lives on and I could enjoy my Sunday periodically.
I, too, grew up reading you, Tynan. From the Great Bus Adventure, to the indoor pool saga, to poker and PUA. You inspired me to think outside the box.
I am sad that I won’t get to read you as often, but understand that you need to do what’s right for you.
I sincerely thank you for sharing your life and perspective and wish you the best.
Just an older lady here (63) to say that I’ve really enjoyed the ride that is Tynan. Does every post apply to me? No, but I also read about vampires, and unsolved crimes, Elon Musk and various cookbooks. Geez, can’t a girl have a fantasy peek into the life on a fascinating person, who writes with an interesting voice? Too many favorite posts to name, but I will confirm that my husband and I now enjoy many, many adventures in our Pleasure-way Lexor, which is an RV on a 20ft Dodge Promaster frame. YOU set the spark in me for that dream. For that, I will always be grateful. “Little house, big yard” Many thanks and keep writing
Sorry Guys, Tynan moved to Antarctica. He wants to “live off the land” for a while and believes he will “assist future lunar colonization”. Until he comes back, in 5 years, he will not be posting again.
I love reading your blog posts! I also like that when going to your blog there are like five new articles to read – but admittedly I only tend to gravitate to your blog once a season during the sumertime.
Holy shit some of these comments… yeah you’re not Shakespeare but this is a blog and you’re writing gets the information across sufficiently. I plan on implementing the shared property idea with my friend group, so thank you for that.
A brief update about Tynan: He has arrived safely in Antarctica and survived the first few weeks. He has enough equipment and supplies to last about six months, after which he hopes to find ways to live off the land. As he is operating outside the usual legal frameworks, for safety reasons we will not reveal his precise location or movements. Rest assured he is safe and well.
Good stuff. All good stuff. Enough with the negative talk. More positive love, please. You’re all beautiful.