I’ve realized that I prioritize in a pretty different way than others. I don’t know that my way is the best way for everyone, but by sharing it I think I may at least expose a few ideas that will be useful for others.
One of my very top priorities is self sufficiency. Not in the prepper sort of way, but just that I want to make sure I can completely take care of all of my needs without imposing upon anyone else. By doing this I can ensure that I have a good life and also that I have the maximum capacity to direct my attention towards other people.
The obvious expression of this is having developed a very satisfying yet extremely inexpensive lifestyle (even with the “luxuries” in my life, I can easily live under $1000/mo) as well as enough effort-independent income to cover those costs permanently. But it also extends beyond finance. I am completely emotionally stable and happy without anyone else. That’s not to say that I don’t benefit from being around others, only that I don’t lean on them for my own well being.
After self-sufficiency, my next priority is probably great relationships with great people. Three of my favorite people were all in Tokyo for the same two days, mostly by coincidence, so I went out for the weekend. Sometimes I fly to San Francisco for just a day or two to see my friends there. Even when I have very important work to do, I’ll put it aside to have tea with my friends.
This is the reason that I travel so much. I’ve found that there’s no better bonding mechanism than a trip with some great people, so I say yes to nearly every invitation and try to create many of my own invitations as well.
Ironically, this is also why I try not to meet new people. At this point I know so many people that I find it more valuable to deepen relationships with people I already know.
Another big priority I have is to only impact people positively. This is not possible to achieve completely, but I try. I try to impose as little as possible on others and to do as much as I can for them. This extends even to people I’ll never met, and is why there’s essentially no advertising or sales pitches on my site.
I also prioritize complete life experience. This one is a bit selfish, but I’d rather acknowledge a selfish priority than to pretend it doesn’t exist. I figure that since I’m here in this incredible world and that it’s all very likely to be ephemeral and futile, I may as well experience it all while I’m here. That’s why I started traveling, why I take random classes like pottery and ballet, and why I strongly favor doing things that others rarely or never do.
Are these the best priorities? Probably not. It would be incredible if I happened to discover the Best Set of Priorities Ever. But they work well for me and they’re flexible enough that I can modify as I go. And, most importantly, I actually stick to my priorities and live my life based on them. That gives me continuity (change priorities and watch my actions follow) as well as checks and balances (does this action line up with my priorities? If not, change one or the other).
If you don’t know what your priorities are, it pays to figure them out. The best way is to look at your actions and ask yourself what someone would assume your priorities are, if he could see everything you do. If you don’t like what you discover, then you can consciously choose your priorities and make sure that your actions follow them.
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Photo is a path on the island. I took a lot of island photos while I was there by myself, and haven’t been good about taking photos otherwise. I’ll be on a cruise soon, so that should yield some good ones.
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