I don't think I'm some sort of bigshot who gets people fired because they look at me wrong. Really, I tend to make friends with most people. But there have been two incidents.
I was on a cruise ship for two weeks, heading around the Caribbean with three friends. The worst part about cruise ships are the weird little markets they have where they sell crap like "gold chains by the foot". These little stands are always in the main hallways that you cross all the time.
On our way to dinner we said hello to the two people manning a stand, an attractive Australian girl and a chubby guy.
We chatted for a few minutes and introduced ourselves. The girl's name was Sarah, and the guy's name was Dane.
"I'm terrible with names, but I try to make pictures to remember names. So for you, Dane..."
In a split second I realized what I was going to say next, and regretted it before it even came out of my mouth. The giddy smile that was growing on his face screamed at me that he was going to take it the wrong way.
But it ways too late.
"I'll think of a great dane. Like the dog."
He hesitated for a second.
"If I was a great dane, I would like your face."
He then, using his tongue and finger, gestured on his own face how he would lick me. That split second of my life will haunt me forever.
Still, no big deal. A gay guy, who was an employee, hit on me. Pretty creepy, but not the end of the world. I stared at him blankly with slight disapproval to semi-politely indicate that I would in no way be pleased to be licked.
We went to dinner and laughed about it.
But things only escalated. The next time we passed, we had another conversation:
"Hey, Tynan, what are you doing in Belize?"
"Oh, I don't know yet."
"Do you want to come to the beach with me?"
"I'll see what we're all going to do..."
"No, I mean just you and me."
"Umm, no thanks."
"I'll show you the best beach."
It was getting really awkward. I left. Later I rejoined my friends and they told me that Dane had been trying to find me.
His aggressiveness was getting really uncomfortable. I started taking alternate routes to avoid his stand in the hallway. Seven days later the cruise was over. All in all, I didn't think much about it. It was awkward, but it was over.
A month later a friend of mine called. He had won a cruise and wanted to know if I wanted to come. Of course I did.
And then, with two weeks before boarding, I finally took a look at the tickets. It was the same exact ship. There was just no way I was going to spend another week with The Great Dane.
One e-mail later, I was assured he wouldn't be working for the cruise company anymore.
Why not just say, "I'm not gay. If I sent mixed signals I apologize. Stop hitting on me. I'm not interested and it's not funny. Quite frankly, you're making me uncomfortable. Thanks." That's potentially the end of it. If he continues then you have all rights to have him fired. You're on a cruise ship. What kind of atmosphere did you expect? You obviously have some issues and you should be embarrassed that you got someone fired. The conversation when he was fired probably went something like this, "You've been harassing a passenger and have been completely inappropriate. You're fired." The guy was probably completely confused by the whole matter.
I think that these kind of posts are a good addition to any "personal development" blog as they remind us that the writer in question is still only human and can be wrong at times.
not cool man.. you should have been straight with him and just said 'im not gay, give me some space man.'
not a good post ty.
I definitely agree with Seth on this one - if this had been my first read of your blog I would have closed it out and probably not come back again.
I don't think you described how creepy and obnoxious he was. Like Seth said it came off as homophobic to me as well.
Didnt really enjoy that read. poor little gay guy...
how would it have been if it was a hot girl?
also, you mentioned you have shortened your story... unfortunatly, it seems thats the way your blog is going. Gone are the awesome storys of Ty's past, with lengthy posts and pics. So glad i started reading your blog a couple years ago.
Long live the penguin story!!
It's all good, sounds like he's a creepy gay guy who deserves to get fired. I'm sure you know the story better than I do from your brief description. But your article as it stands isn't funny at all and could be really offensive to people who are lame enough to get offended. Just lookin out for ya.
Man... I will never be able to guess which posts people will jump on.
1. It was VERY obvious I was either not gay or not interested. This is also pre hat, by the way.
2. He's an employee making someone very uncomfortable. If I was his employer, I would definitely want to know about the behaviour.
3. You can talk about controlling the frame all day, but the bottom line is that if I'm PAYING to be on a cruise, I shouldn't have to deal with an employee who is obnoxiously persistent.
I left parts of the story out to make it shorter. There were probably 4-5 of these incidents where he'd act very inappropriately. Sarah at one point apologized for him and told me that he always did this.
Anyway, I'm glad he got fired. I thought people would find the story funny.
As I may have mentioned before, I am a huge fan of cruises. Although I haven't gone on one yet this year, I usually go on at least one or two every year. Where the cruise actually goes is wholly unimportant to me. Half the time I sleep through the stops anyway, and just stay on the boat. I just like having no cell phone, having great food available 24/7, and sitting on the back of the boat watching the waves.
It takes a certain type of person to enjoy a cruise. Usually that person is an old person. My friend Jonah and I are the two exceptions. I think we've gone on two cruises together, and each time we were the only people remotely close to our age. So much for meeting the hot ladies pirate-style.
On one such cruise we woke up at our usual time - 3pm. The boat was docked in Mexico, and was leaving at 5:30, meaning that everyone had to be on the boat at 5.
I love San Francisco so much that every time I return here from a trip, I resolve to stay for a while and enjoy the city. That never happens. Next week I'm going to Tahoe, then Vegas the following weekend, and then to Austin for SXSW the week after that. Cabo or Hawaii follows in early March, but in late April comes the most exciting upcoming trip: a sixteen day cruise to Rome.
Cruises are full of old people. As best I can tell, that's because young people haven't figured out how awesome and cheap they can be. In fact, I can easily say that of all the travel I've done, cruises probably represent the best bang for the buck.
Before I tell you how to get them cheap, let me tell you why cruises, especially long duration one-way cruises are amazing.
One of my favorite aspects of cruises is that they can take you to places you may not otherwise visit. For example, the cruise my friends and I are taking stops in the Azores, Seville (Spain), Valencia (Spain), Barcelona, Monte Carlo, and Rome. Without cruising, I probably would never make it to the Azores, and those southern Spanish cities are unlikely as well. They're just too remote and too expensive to come up at the top of my list when choosing a trip.