This is going to be the first article in a brand new category called "Social Skills" added to my seemingly-random category list. This series is especially for you pick up people out there. In my time teaching, I always had a good feeling for who would be successful and who would not be, way before we ever went out.
The reason was that some people had blatantly bad social skills. Face it - if you can't interact with GUYS properly, you're starting with girls with a major handicap. So here we're going to talk about everything from e-mail to gift giving. What's first on our radar? Being late. Read on...
Some people are notoriously late for everything. I used to be one of those people myself. But over time it annoyed me when people were late so much that I put in the work and changed that habit. That's not to say that I'm ALWAYS on time. Sometimes it's better to be a little late, and sometimes there are unforseen circumstances. But make no mistake - everyone notices how timely everyone else is, and this can be used to your advantage. Here's a list of common situations, and how prompt to be for each.
There you have it - a complete guide to promptness and lack thereof. When in doubt, though, just be on time. If you are chronically late, you will almost certainly be less respected by those around you, so this is an important change to make. If you have that problem, then start off by leaving 15 minutes early for everything and being early for everything. Once you get a handle on that, you can start getting fancy by following my guidelines above.
I like the idea of showing up early to a party for preselection reasons. I find that being the first one in allows you to develop a relationship with the most amount of people. So by the end of the party, you have more people to converse with and you're getting more smiles from people.
Blondie girl here.
being late on a first that?oh oh ,that i dont like.it goes a long way to show disrespect.for me that wuld be the last date.cheers
Nothig worse then an IP being 30 minutes late, and then acting like its no big deal. "Oh dude.. im sorry, so, lets breif quick."
Business meeting with a partner: Being late is a genuinely bad practice. Like you observed early in the article, people pay attention to others' punctuality. When a colleague -- either a peer or a superior -- is consistently late, it's fantastically annoying and unprofessional. Where I work, I meet regularly one-on-one with my instructors, and I follow the idea that five minutes early == on time. Like your first bullet, when you're meeting with a superior, you want to be there earlier than he is as a show of respect.
But I'm there early so that when he's there on time, I'm not leaving him waiting. When my superior arrives late, it doesn't generate an atmosphere of dominance, it just annoys me. It outlines his lack of respect and makes me less eager to want to work with him in the future.
On movies: I remember when I was a kid, my dad used to absolutely insist we get to the theater like an hour early. literally. even for third-week showings. It wasn't until high school that I realized people did anything else. 17 minutes late, so that you sit down as the movie's actually starting -- that's right on the money, man.
For about a year now, I've been very punctual. Before making a concerted effort to be on time to everything, I was like any other average person-- sometimes on time, often a few minutes late, occasionally very late. When I identify something I'm bad at, especially something with a prescription that requires little more than willpower, I get very excited about it. That isn't to say that there are so few of these things that they're hard to find, just that introspection can be difficult, making identifying personal weaknesses tricky.
My initial impetus to become punctual was partly that it was an easily correctable deficiency, and partly that it seemed like a trait of a champion. Would most people I admire show up on time to things? Yes, they would.
As I thought more about it, especially during the early phases where being on time was a bit of a challenge, I realized that punctuality is more than just being on time. It's an extension of your honesty.
It is very important to me to never lie. I'm not perfect, of course, but because this is such an important thing to me, I do a good job of it most of the time. When I thought about it, though, if I say that I'm going to be somewhere at ten thirty, and I show up at ten thirty-four, that's a lie. It's a small lie, but it's a lie nonetheless. Even small lies have an effect, both on others and myself.
Staying up late. We've all had to do it. We've all faced that upcoming exam or book report which for some reason could only be conquered through blood-shot eyes and a tall can of caffeine. Some of my best, if not hopelessly procrastinated, work has been churned out in the wee hours of the morning, but I've been having a change of heart recently. I wish I slept more. Don't get me wrong, I love staying up late. Some of my best memories take place in the dead of night, saturated with Taco Bell, friends, and Netflix bingeing. Yet, I've always wanted to be a morning person. I've always wanted to be able to wake up early with the sun. There is something appealing about that. I love the notion of being alive before anybody else and feeling the cool air reassure me of a new day. However the reality of my life is much different. My mornings at college consist of waking up 5 minutes before class, taking a quick cologne shower, and bolting out the door.
So why do we stay up late? Why do some people have a certain urge to see what happens after all is quiet and still? I've found that living on campus in a dorm of my peers hasn't exactly added to my REM cycles, but it's been this way for a long while. I've always stayed up late, even when I didn't have to. It's almost as though I find any excuse not to sleep. After all, one more episode of The Office can't hurt right? Right...? They say that everybody needs 6-8 hours of sleep a night. If you're like me, you tell yourself that you're one of the special few that only needs 6 hours of sleep. You then convince yourself that everything will be okay by saying, "I'll just finish this episode of CSI and get 5 hours of sleep." Before you know it, you're sitting in physics trying to keep your eyes from burning out of their sockets.
There are many things I could do differently to get better sleep, but here are 3 laws I'm going to live by: