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I've Got My Pockets Jammed With Jeffersons (and other updates)

My friend Jonah decided that he was going to break off his long standing relationship with the more common bills and use two dollar bills as the primary fodder in his wallet. I thought it was ingenious. Here's why:

I never like copying people's quirks, but this one is too good. I told him that I wanted to copy it, but whenever anyone remarked how cool it was, I would give him credit. He agreed.

I went to the bank yesterday and as I was leaving, I remembered that I wanted to get some deuces (oh, did I mention how cool all the nicknames are for them?). They had just gotten a shipment in, so I got my hands on a freshly minted stack of 100 sequentially numbered two dollar bills. Thanks for the idea, Jonah!

Exposure therapy story #2

On HOCD

Originally posted on 27th Dec 2014 at 08:10 PM

I've finally gotten the courage to identify as gay. Now I'm going to come out of the closet. I come out of the closet and people are skeptical like last time. I assure them I'm 100% sure I'm gay. They're still skeptical.

I begin dating girls and I don't really show any signs of liking guys. My relationships with girls are way better than with my ex-boyfriend. I become even more confident that I'm 100% gay. I get involved in the gay community. I advocate against lesbian erasure. This goes on for about a decade.

After a painful breakup I meet this guy. He's quite good looking and he plays guitar. We become friends, but I notice he's flirting with me. At first I feel like this validates my lesbian identity. Then I realize I'm falling for him. We end up making out. I actually enjoy it. We decide to secretly date.

Later people find out. All my lesbian friends abandon me. Everyone that doubted me says "I told you so." I'm now known as the lesbian that fell in love with a man. People mention me whenever young girls try to come out. Some of those young girls develop HOCD like me.

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