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It's fucking early in the morning. I'm at Ty's house. Ty and Neetu are asleep, and I'm left here to battle it out on my own. The last two naps did nothing, except left me hanging in the middle of a sleep cycle. I have a constant dull pain/sleep signal going off in my forhead and behind my eyes. I felt some chest pain earlier. I have to pee a lot, and still very cold and hungry all the time. We went downtown to pass the time during the last cycle. I was too tired to really get into it, but damn did the time fly. We left quick to get back in time for the 1am nap, which sucked ass. My brain is fuxored, my eyes can't focus for very long at any one time. This must be what being addicted to pain killers is like. Maybe I will die.
On the plus side, I haven't had to drive for a few days thanks to my new chauffers Ty and Neetu.
I have a test next Monday and a paper due next Tuesday. I expect to hit some refreshing naps soon so I'll be able to study and get that done. People in my classes were like "you're going to have memory loss, you can't remember stuff on sleep deprivation."
I just took my 9pm and I feel pretty good, but not 100% - just like usual. I don't think that oversleep really affected my progress much.
I did make the Overkill Alarm Clock (tm) - It's a laptop that does nothing but run a cool alarm clock program. It's hooked up to a separate stereo system with a speaker on each side of the bed. I've preprogrammed all of my waking up times, so I don't even need to remember.
Hung out with Manish and Neetu and they are doing well too. We're all going downtown now to help stay awake. I feel like tomorrow or the next day may be when it finally snaps into place and I feel as good or better as when I was sleeping normally.
I overslept by 3.5 hours. I didn't even hear my stupid alarm clock. Now I'm pissed.
I'm going to set up a whole stereo in there and aim it at my face.
I'm also going to use a dedicated computer, rather than my laptop, so that nothing will interfere with it.
Last night was rough. Waking from a nap in the middle of the night does not jive with me yet--daytime is much better. When waking from a nap in the middle of the night, your mind starts saying stuff like "what's the point of this shit", "maybe you should do this later, after school...you might fail your tests if you don't get sleep." It's funny how my mind has a bullshit generator installed and running in the background at all times to keep me safe. It will belch out some instant rationalization why I shouldn't move past my limits at the first sign of discomfort. Fortunately, in this instance, I'm able to recognize it and adjust accordingly.
I didn't have much to do last night, as I had little planning going in to this. We were supposed to start on Nov. 21st. Every activity, and every minute of every cycle were to be planned out in a spectacle of time-management, but we jumped the gun and just went for it, figuring we could always do that later.
I felt really good, alert, and positive after my 2:30 nap today, although my body is seemingly cold and hungry at all times. My low blood pressure causes me to have cold extremities most of the time anyways, so I can deal with it. Before the nap I had drowsiness and heavy feelings in my chest and of course eyes.
So the past few cycles have been rough... I often find myself having to conciously force myself to keep my eyes open and focused. Because of this I was cutting the cycles in half, but that didn't seem to be doing too much for me. During this last one I decided to just push myself to complete some projects and see if it made a difference. As luck would have it, it made all the difference in the world. Just moving around and doing a few things made me feel almost as awake as yesterday.
As a result I'm going to push my nap forward to make up for those added naps. I'll feel better anyway. I'm still trying to decide on my final schedule. Right now I'm leaning towards 11, 3, 7. The main reason is because it would make it very easy to go out to clubs.
For some reason this time around feels a lot more different than my previous attempts. In a way it seems like I'm more in control. Before I always felt like it may get so bad that I would have to quit. Now I just feel like I may have to up my focus and effort, but that that anything thrown my way can be crushed.
I took a nap in the middle of my awake period because I was so tired. I woke up and didn't feel better.
BUT - I am hardcore so I continue.
I take my regularly scheduled nap and wake up after only 14 minutes, feeling great. I love it!
It's getting worse.... I will conquer it, though.
I've noticed that I'm feeling groggy for less time after each nap. I barely feel it at all after that one.
So far every time I wake up I'm filled with a sense of panic, thinking I've overslept. It's amazing that such a short time can actually refresh you at all.
Not much else to report, really. I think I'm on this for good.
Still going strong. When I wake up from a nap I don't feel tired like I would if I normally would from waking up early. Instead I feel slightly disoriented and groggy. This goes away fully during the first 20 minutes of being awake or so. I'm definitely awake enough to drive.
This last wakeup seemed pretty good. I felt maybe slightly less tired than the previous ones.
This time I actually had dreams that I wasn't sleeping. Sounds weird, is weird, but probably less than it sounds.
I also experience some confusion when waking up. Each time I don't recognize that the alarm is the reason I'm awake.