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As far as I was concerned, she was perfect. She was at least as smart as I was, was a dancer and had the body to prove it, and had a smile that could disarm the national guard. Let's call her Julie.
So, like an earthworm stalking it's prey, I put my usual game on her. Since my last flowchart was so popular, I've made another one to show you how I dealt with the ladies back then:
Nedless to say, things went slowly. We hung out nearly every day for the last couple months of our Senior year summer vacation. Like many guys, I was totally oblivious to her attraction for me. One morning Julie came over really early while I was still sleeping, and squeezed into my twin bed with me. I woke up, and assumed that she must be tired - it didn't even occur to me that she might like me. Finally on the last week of that vacation she said to me,
People often comment that I have a lot of discipline. Even if you go through some comments on posts in this blog, you'll see people saying that. I even agree with them - I've been working this polyphasic thing for over two months now! Very few nights have gone by that haven't involved an intense struggle to stave off sleepiness.
The funny thing is that I used to be completely UNdisciplined. It was almost a joke amongst my friends and families. What changed? Read on...
The problem was that I didn't trust myself. If I said "I'm going to not eat meat for 30 days", I knew that since I was undisciplined, that it might not actually be true. So when day three rolled around and I saw a hamburger, I'd think subconciously, "Well, I wasn't going to make it thirty days anyway" and I'd chow down. Even small things like saying "I'm going to go to sleep after one more game" would get stretched. My promises to myself were worthless.
Before I went to Massachusetts, things were peachy. I did 4 days with only one hour of oversleeping. Then during Massachusetts I did rather poorly, but still not too bad. When I got back I was settling back into my polyphasic/gangsta lifestyle, but that got interrupted for my trip to Vegas. And Vegas, surprisingly, wasn't kind to the schedule.
Since then I've been trying to get back on the boat, so to speak. Last night I only overslept by 90 minutes, but I just woke up from a 4 hour (!!!!) oversleep. So now, I confess that I've been keeping something from you, dear reader.
Ok. I know I put this same picture up a couple days ago - but there's a reason. Someone STOLE my chain last night. I am incapable of taking another picture with the chain now. Here's how the caper went down :
A friend of mine was having a birthday party. Because it was important to me that his party be cool, I lugged over my huge subwoofer, a projector, my laptop, and all the cables and stuff. I also spent a good part of my day downloading music videos. I even skipped a nap to set it up. And it should be said that I hate doing any sort of manual labor, but I carried that subwoofer up the stairs to the party. Ok, so I didn't heal any sick children or anything, but the point is that I made a genuine effort to contribute to this party.
Incidentally, I also wore my chain, hat, and other interesting accoutrements. Of course, throughout the night, many people wanted to try on the chain. Why not? Everyone's got a little gangsta in them, and it's healthy to express that.
Want to know what the best part of your business coming to a screeching halt is? LOOTING. I had a very successful business for 6 years that I recently stopped. It was good money, but was a lot of stress and not particularly rewarding. I had several state of the art computers at the office, so I looted them today. Now I have three monitors instead of one, and a sweet ass water machine.
Also, I went to
Home Depot Jacob the Jeweler and got some sick bling today. Composed mostly entirely out of stainless steel fine platinum, it weighs in at 6 pounds. Besides being horribly uncomfortable around the neck, it punches me in the stomach with the lock as I walk. I consider the purchase an overwhelming success. One of my good friends is throwing a party tomorrow night, and I plan on rocking the chain.
Coming tomorrow... what it's like when people think you're a celebrity... (really)
So I'm trying to be a good little blogger and update this puppy every day. I've got two hours left before it's tomorrow and I don't have the picture I need to do the update I want, so we're going into the vault.
A couple years ago I put the biggest above ground pool I could find in my living room. The pictures were posted to a bunch of those link collecting sites and almost 7000 people saw the pictures the first day. Every year or so they are rediscovered and they get a ton of hits. However, I've never publicly told the story of the pool and why I did it. Avast!
One day my friend Crystal sends me an IM. Here's a dramatic rendition of the event :
As I wrote in a previous article, I stayed for a few days in the Luxor Penthouse Suite. It's available only to high rollers and is about 4800 sqft. Because I had previously always wanted to see the inside of one of these suites, I took a few minutes and snapped some pictures for you.
We have plans to go back to Vegas already. The Golden Nugget is going to fly us out to Vegas, and then fly to Houston via private jet to see the Miami Heat vs. Houston Rockets game. I'm not actually a basketball fan, but I like seeing games live and have always wanted to ride in a private jet. Also, the Luxor has invited us to see the Mosley vs. Vargas boxing match. Expect pictures of both, and many other events to come...
Check out the pictures of the luxor suite.
As some of you may know, I paint my nails silver. Why? Everyone always asks, but the real answer is just because I think it's cool.
When I read this article about
The salon in the Wynn is gorgeous. It's huge and very well decorated. As they do at many spas, they offered me a drink. I don't drink, so I got water. It always strikes me as a weird offer, though. I manage to take a few sips, and then my hands are being worked on for a little over an hour, making it impossible to drink the water.
I'm wearing an offensively soft egyptian terry cotton robe right now. I just got out of the solid marble steam room that's in my bathroom. Before that I was soaking with some lavender sea salts in the raised jacuzzi tub, also off my bedroom. Before that I was having my ass kissed by a variety of casino employees.
That's right, I'm in the penthouse suite of the Luxor hotel.
Yesterday a friend of mine called me to ask how to play Blackjack. He was at the luxor playing rather large hands of blackjack. So large, in fact, that they offered him the penthouse suite, which must be at least 4000 sq. ft. He offered to fly me up to occupy the second bedroom of the suite. At first I declined - I don't like to accept favors I can't repay.
I had my first
I had woken up naturally after about 15 minutes of sleep, and as I was drifting back into dreamland, I realized that I was sleeping right as I started to dream. I thought "wow... let's try out this lucid dream stuff" and leapt off some stairs. I hit the pavement and it felt like real pain, although it didn't last. Then I figured that I needed to think about flying, and as soon as I did, I could feel myself being yanked way into the air.
It was a strange experience. I could barely see what was happening in the dream... everything was really fuzzy. But I could feel it as if it was actually happening. I woke up after just a minute or so.