It's something I think about quite a bit. As if my internal Code of Conduct says "I know that I could (make the money/get the girl/get promoted, etc.) that way...but I won't"

How you play does matter. Thanks Tynan.

As you point out, stubbornness - or maybe perseverance would be a better word, is respectable only in certain situations.

The one thing I have to take issue with is the notion that lots of "scammy internet marketers" are "making hundreds of thousands of dollars pushing worthless diet pills." The internet makes it seem like everyone is doing it, but most internet marketers are part of just-as-scammy multi-level marketing schemes and don't make much money at all.

More relevant to your situation: I recently read something similar about young technomads who are fulltiming, and how, while the internet makes it seem like they are everywhere, they rarely run into other on the road. (Slightly different phenomenon, but similar idea.)

I suppose it depends on what the guy's goal was, but from my perspective, he didn't really win...

If he's still calling her after she broke up with him, then obviously he didn't meet his goal.

Then again, maybe she'll eventually pick up the phone and they'll be back together again...until they aren't.

And the vicious cycle continues.

Hey Tynan,

It seems that the stubbornness in this guys case did not win him anything at all. He basically forced himself into a situation where he wasn't necessarily wanted or appreciated, and now he's going through even more pain throughout the rejection.

Had he had the tact to realize that there was no connection right away, and walked away, he wouldn't be thinking about this girl anymore. However, now he's really hurt, trying to get her back, trying to figure out what went wrong -- nothing went wrong, it wasn't there all along.

Good call. Once in a while we need to hear this.

That kind of persistence may have gotten him that girlfriend but it's sad she didn't even like him... not really a relationship that will make any of them happy or enrich her life experience! It also says something about the girl... I am not judging but that would be a turnoff for me.

I think persistence is a very important quality for being successful in business or dating but like you said... if you overdo it you will become a stalker or a scammer.

When you go after every customer totally hardcore you will get much more pissed of people asking for refunds and talking crap (if your product is mediocre). You can ignore those bad customers and invest your time in other marketing avenues.

This means you can be persistent and not be a scammer. Selling Acai Berry pills is bad karma because you know it will not work for those people!

By the way, a few weeks ago I saw your video presentation on the mindset of a professional gambler and that changed my mindset a lot. It literally lowered my stress levels of my business and personal life! Thanks for the powerful message!

@ Alex Shalman

I've got to say, while this guy isn't going the way I would, that doesn't mean he's going through pain. He might have a couple girls he is calling, this might just be one of them. Maybe not, just a thought.

Being reminded about the gambling conference, good stuff :). BTW, Tynan, you've got to come out to New York Binghamton sometime! If you can make it, I can try and get Binghamton to book a hall for you.

I agree.
However it's also true that winners are those that write history.

i loved this post, especially the ambivalence. Being overtly persistant is a way to get what you want, but that path can be quite ugly, effective but without tact.

I agree with you that this guy did not reach his personal goal with this girl. Although that "goal" may have changed over the course of their relationship. It may be sexual at first, but then it may have become one of self esteem and self desirability in other's eye. Either way, I appreciate persistence in a noble goal. Based on the story, however, I am afraid that this may not have been the case...