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Huge Decisions

My cousin is deciding which college to go to. There's pressure, because this is going to be one of the biggest decisions of her life. I was thinking about that tonight as she and her mother talked about schools all over the US with all sorts of pros and cons.

The course of her life will be determined by the school she chooses. Mine was, and I dropped out after a year and a half. I made a friend who I learned gambling with, which funded my life for seven years. I met one of my best friends while I was there.

She'll go for four years, so I imagine it will have an even larger impact on her. It's daunting, just to think about, really.

At the same time, I don't think it matters much where she goes. Huge decision, huge impact, low importance.


On The Wild While of Mild Miles

When did the whirlpool become an ocean?

I've been drifting; in between days, floating from one dreary hour to the next. A go with the flow momentum, no matter the maelstrom of monumental strife met at certain moments in my life.

There's an old saying, I remember my father trying to reinforce

"If you fail to plan, you plan to fail"

I've always considered that a paradox. After all, if you have a plan to fail, that's still a plan, isn't it? And it has a rather high chance of guaranteed success. But that's circular, defeatist thinking, isn't it? And we're not allowed to have that are we, as a species striving towards the next stage of evolution, our progressive culture programmed way before puberty struck with self-awareness.

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