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The (near) Future of Tynan

If you're wondering why I always put my name in the topics of these things, it's not because I have a huge ego. I do have a huge ego, but I do it so that my name gets better search rankings in google. My goal is for people to be able to search for "Tynan" and for my site to be number one. Soon. If you want to help, like the almighty Magnus, you can link to my blog and put my name in the link.

Today Doug, Steve, Steve's (ex?) girlfriend, Todd and I headed down to Canyon Lake, TX to do some tubing. You see, I bought the sweetest tube ever to bring to the lake. The thing actually flies 15 feet in the air behind the boat. I think I wrote about it before, but I'm not sure. Anyway, the first time we tried I skipped along the water, but didn't really take flight because my weak human lungs couldn't inflate the tube enough.

Today before going to the lake I bought two different pumps to ensure that the thing would actually inflate. As it turned out, the boat rental place had a sweet air compressor, negating the need for our own pumps. Oh well... you owe me one (two?), Wal Mart. Our rental boat was a shoddy looking boat most certainly manufactured before 1990 which was apparently very fast. The interior was a coccoon of brightly colored vinyl couches covered by a weathered bimini top. I climbed aboard and with the help of Todd, tied the monsterous tube to the boat.

Well... This Is Awkward

On Jumbled Thoughts

One day my friends and I were looking for an adventure so we decided to explore a scandalous store in the area to see what it was like. The store is located on Boston Post Road, is called VIP (which stands for very intimate pleasures) and is essentially a sex or erotic boutique. The store sells products geared towards sexual or erotic entertainment including lingerie and pornography. At first, my friends and i thought that putting ourselves into the situation would be really awkward and uncomfortable, but it ended up being sort of fun just to laugh about the random things we saw. In the end, I gained a new found respect for romance boutiques everywhere.

Although I tried to push any derogatory thoughts out of my mind, I had some negative expectations of what the store would be like once we entered. I tried to have an unbiased view, but I honestly expected to walk in and see shelves of pornography lining every wall, blow-up dolls strewn everywhere and fur handcuffs on each shelf. I expected the place to be really trashy and raunchy. However, I was highly mistaken. We walked in and before we were able to do or really see anything, we were asked for our IDs to make sure we were of age. This alone made the environment pretty respectable in my eyes.

After we got done showing our IDs, we looked around only to find that things were very organized, similar to any other ordinary store. Each shelf had neatly placed items on it, which almost made the store seem as if it was very classy, not tacky like my friends and I had expected. Seeing as this store was quite large, we spent about an hour and a half walking around, looking at literally every single thing on each shelf. At first it was so awkward, but then my friends and I started giggling and having a good time.

The store was set up very similar to the way a Wal-Mart or a department store would be set up. As we went down each aisle, we really noticed the ridiculous things on the shelves. There were some raunchy items that we undeniably expected to see, as well as more conservative and discreet products. We saw things there that we would never imagine could be used in a sexual way, as well as simple products such as shot glasses or bachelorette party gifts.

While in the store, my friends and I saw several noticeably dodgy looking people, who we could definitely tell would never admit to being in a store such as this. Every single customer refused to make eye contact with anyone and seemed to want to get out of there as soon as possible. As we continued exploring, we saw that the back of the store was lined with costumes, wigs and lingerie. This is the area that I noticed the most customers were located. I even awkwardly smiled at a couple looking at sexy costumes and lingerie. Hahaha even though I smiled to remove the tension in the air, I realized that I just made it super awkward for them and they quickly shuffled away. It was obvious to me that they felt really uncomfortable with the idea that they were visually acknowledged in what is considered to be such a taboo environment.

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