I used to be uncomfortable with maintaining eye contact. Then I did an exercise where I looked into a stranger's eyes for fifteen minutes, and we'd call each other out every time the other person looked away. It cured me of all eye contact anxiety and now it's no big deal.
I did a similar exercise in rejection therapy to get over the fear of approaching strangers and asking for things, and that worked eerily well--after one hour of concentrated asks and rejections, I got over it.
Like many people, I'm often uncomfortable when hugging someone, especially if it's another guy or I don't know the person well. This is something I want to get over, too. I've heard that if you arrange to hug someone you don't (hardly) know for fifteen minutes, then you're good to go from then on, no matter how awkward a bro hug you're faced with.
Does anyone in the SF Bay Area want to meet up and undertake the scary, useful mission of hugging a stranger (me) and build some hug confidence? We could do the eye contact one, too, if that's useful to you.
This is awesome. I'd squeeze yah for 15 minutes, except I'm in Montreal.
But here's an idea: post some paper ads around town, you'll definitely find some (possibly a bit creepy, but that could be a good thing for fear overcoming) takers.
If you're ever in Germany I'll hug the shit outta ya ;)
But seriously, kudos for doing this. It takes a big man to admit this kind of thing and go do something about it.
I can't figure out how to find your profile, but I'm in if you're still looking for someone in San Francisco.
Haha, great! Let's do it--email me at firstname.lastname@example.org and we'll meet up. I'm in China for the next two weeks, but after that I'll reply.
I would be glad to hug you but I'm living in Berlin.
I think I got over most of my own uncomfortability through dancing. Dancing Bachata can mean spending 15 minutes in a hugging position with a stranger.
When it comes to hugging guys that are bigger than myself I often tried to keep eyelevel which put my into an awkward position. I learned recently, that's okay that some other guys are taller than yourself. I'm 181cm tall ;)
Ahoy! Six days ago I finally put my eyeballs in front of a laser and got my vision corrected. It's something that I've wanted to do for years, but never got around to doing because of the cost, the worry that I'd miss out on a new technology, and the uncertainty of which procedure to get. As I'm known to do, I researched everything on the subject (... and was then corrected by my friend Hayden who had read even more...) and I'm confident that I got the absolute best procedure.
Your eyball is a disaster. It's not perfectly round. It's probably too squished or too oblong, and the surface has little imperfect bumps on it. The part that laser surgeries deal with is the cornea - the layer of your eye that covers your iris and pupils. The cornea is responsible for focusing light onto the retina in the back of the eyeball, so it makes sense that this is where we focus.
Both PRK and Lasik (the two most popular surgeries) zap off chunks of your cornea to make a nice smooth cornea that perfectly focuses text from tynan.net onto your retina.
Leo Babauta has inspired millions through his writing on Zen Habits, where he's shared his experiences in building up great habits, cutting clutter and junkfood from his life, learning about great parenting and building a wonderful family, eliminating debt, increasing his income and productivity, and living a life that's more happy through and through.
Leo is now graciously participating in GiveGetWin with a practical class on "action-oriented contentment", and he sat down with Sebastian Marshall to share his thoughts on what motivates him, around what contentment is, on trusting yourself, on being compassionate and compassion as an impetus for action, on self-compassion and treating yourself well, and happiness in general. Enjoy:
"Practical, Action-Oriented Contentment and Compassion" by Leo Babauta, as told to Sebastian Marshall