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Random Gifts

I woke up and stumbled to the front door to check for packages. I wasn't really expecting one, but you can never be too sure. To my surprise there was a small brown box waiting on the doorstep for me. What had I ordered? I couldn't remember. I walked back inside and tore the package open.

Inside was a book and a board game. Not just any book and board game, though - they were abominations thrust in in front of my virgin eyes. The game was called A Hot Affair and the book was Penthouse: Naughty by Nature: Female Readers' Sexy Letters to Penthouse. Confused, I check the shipping address. Sure enough they weren't meant for me.

They were my neighbor's.

Parents and lemonade.

On The Life Of An Ordinary Teenager

I have a lot of questions about the entire universe. Why are there feelings and emotions? Where did they come from? Who came up with letters and numbers? Why should we be learning about these ridiculous things at school?

School is hard. Remembering so many different techniques and words. It's exhausting to do this 10 months a year. Start school to graduate and go to college. Then, get a good job and work a whole lot. After, take care of the kids, if you have any, and then die. Great. Life and its awesome moments and experiences sucks either ways. Everybody gets sick of working or doing something over and over again. I believe that work never ends. Even when you are having a conversation with someone, you think of what you should and shouldn't say. Ask yourself if what's coming out of your mouth is worth saying.

As good as life can get, it always has a price. I need freedom and to let go of stupid rules and lies that the older folks tell us. In Science today, my teacher took off points of my lab exam because i glued a half of a sprite bottle on my project. He said it was useless. I told him that things would change when i was going to be in charge of the education minister. I will make school worth living for. Have you ever seen the movie accepted? I absolutely think it's brilliant! It's this guy who got rejected to a bunch of schools and started a college of his own just to get his parents off his back. I wonder what kind of parents there are out there. My parents let us do pretty much what we want and are the most loving of all.

I wanna know why we live. My friend, Jessica, attempted suicide not too long ago and i just found out today. I have had weird thoughts on suicide but trust me, i've had them. Not because i was really miserable or i had problems. Because i wondered why i should work hard in life. I never was actually able to take away my own life because i start thinking of people who are dying and don't want to. A mom who just past because there was an earthquake. Did she want to die? No. If she could of lived for her kids, would she have? Yeah... probably. People who have cancer and don't have much time left know they're dying, and you're just there wanting to kill yourself for pain that can be healed. Amber, the famous Amber, might have cancer. In 2 years, she might die. I learned that earlier and was completely shocked. The stories in the books and movies are happening at my school right now.

It gets me thinking sometimes when i realize the luck i have. I wonder how many thoughts we have in our heads every single day. Finn is still on my mind and i don't know what to do about it. I keep thinking of things i could tell him but then choke. My mouth can't pronounce these words that i desperately want to say. In P.E class, i was the only girl who played hockey off-ice. I had fun kicking boys asses because i was proving them wrong. This guy in 10th grade was playing and he's super popular and suppose to be..... " hot ". I'm just this little 8th grader who's the only girl playing the sport. What made me extremely proud was, i was beating his ass so hard he started raging. I'm good at sports. There's another thing, i hate sports.

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