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Little May Updates

I still live in the RV. People ask how long I'm going to stay here and honestly I don't know. I love it so much that I don't even want to leave. I DO want a solar panel, though, which gets installed thursday. That's exciting. Did I already mention that I had 5 people over to play cards? That's six people in the tiny RV including me, which is my personal record. Soon I will have a house party.

I learned (the basics of) PHP, MYSQL, and AJAX in the past week. They have such scary names I assumed that it would be really difficult to learn, but in fact it's super easy. I'm making a quiz site (like those myspace quizzes), and I already have most of it done. It's even fancy and ajaxy. If you're a lady, pretend that this last paragraph was about me saving kids from a fire, and not about nerdy stuff. Thanks.

My eyes are getting better and better from PRK. Still not totally recovered, but almost certainly 20/20. We go in for a checkup in a few days, so we'll see what the doctor says.

Deeper Understanding

On Standing Deeper

Whatever I'm doing, it's not working.

Here I am; 34, in serious debt to the IRS, fresh off a break-up and I work in the morning and it's 5am.

And I'm blogging.

Ya see, like many of you, I'm sure, I have so many things I want to learn about and do; eat Paleo, exercise more and better, learn new languages, computer programming and brain training, meditate every day to stop the feeling of your life casually passing you by... And like some of you, I believe, I end up doing very little. I want to live a more minimalist lifestyle but I'm buried under stuff. I shop for healthy food and it rots in the fridge. I tell myself how important rest is but here I am in front of my computer at 5am.

I know there's a better way, I've read about it. I can see this better version of me but I just can't seem to live up to it. Really kills me inside. The worst part about it is the vicious cycle aspect; inaction leads to depression leads to inaction. Maybe you've felt the same thing?

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